Courtesy Wash - Part 1

Ladies (and Gents), if you answer yes to any of the following questions, DO NOT read this blog.

1) Are you easily offended?
2) Do you get "grossed-out" easily?
3) Do you consider yourself "prim and proper"?
4) Do your friends consider you "prim and proper"?
5) Ever gagged just watching Dirty Jobs?
6) Was Seinfeld just an OK television show to you?

Okay, now that we've got that out of the way.







I would like to discuss a very common phenomenon. I call it the "courtesy wash". For laziness' sake, I will heretofore refer to it as "CW". This is NOT referring to the television channel equivalent of a B movie. Nor to a style of music that is now almost just like rock but sometimes still performed by people wearing cowboy hats.

What is a "CW", you might ask. All men have experienced it. I experienced it today. I was in a restroom stall (yes, ladies, guy's restrooms have stalls, too), and I heard someone enter. They took care of their business very quickly. Then I heard it happen. The water turned on...the water turned off. The sound of a hastily grabbed paper towel and the person was out the door!! Now, I didn't witness this with my eyes, but my ears could not lie.

It was a CW!! (remember, that stands for courtesy wash)

For some reason, men at times feel too guilty to leave the restroom without washing their hands. However!! The don't really WANT to wash their hands, so thus was invented the CW.

In case it is not clear, here's how you do it.

1. Enter the restroom (this part is required)
2. Use the restroom
3. Turn on the sink faucet
   
4. Pass your hands (or sometimes just one) underneath the water as quickly as possible
5. Then you either
1. Grab a paper towel, wad it up, throw it away, or
   
2. In the event of (stupid) air dryers, you wipe your hands on your pants.
6. Exit the restroom
   

I've never met a woman who has done a CW. I've never met a man who hasn't.

Tune in next time when I'll relate the lost script of the forgotten episode of Seinfeld, involving the notorious CW!!